NASCAR OFFSEASON DISORDER: THE FAQ'S

ALL ABOUT NOD


WHAT IS #NOD, OR NASCAR OFFSEASON DISORDER?
IT IS A LACK OF NASCAR ON TV. NO OTHER DESCRIPTION IS NECESSARY.

WHAT ARE THE SIGNS AND SYMPTOMS OF NOD?
- INCOHERENT TWEETS WITH THE HASHTAG OF NASCAR
- SCROLLING THROUGH THE TV CHANNELS TO HOPEFULLY FIND SOME NASCAR
- DOING DAILY TASKS THAT INADVERTENTLY MIMIC NASCAR RACES (i.e. "GETTING THE GROCERIES 500")
- WEARING A FULL-FACE HELMET TO USE THE BATHROOM
- INSTALLING A WINDOW NET IN YOUR TOYOTA COROLLA
- IT MUST BE NOTED THAT NOD MAY ALSO MIMIC REAL-LIFE ILLNESS SYMPTOMS. (STAYING IN BED, CRYING, UNCONTROLLABLE SHAKES, FEVER)

WHAT CAUSES NOD?
THE NASCAR SEASON ENDS IN NOVEMBER AND DOES NOT BEGIN UNTIL FEBRUARY. THAT IS BASICALLY THREE MONTHS OF NO NASCAR. FANS OF NASCAR HAVE NOTHING TO DO. THEY ARE BASICALLY LEFT WITH A VOID IN THEIR LIVES. THE HOLIDAY SEASON (THANKSGIVING, CHRISTMAS, NEW YEAR'S) IS A TEMPORARY FIX TO AN OTHERWISE LONG OFFSEASON.

WHO CAN DIAGNOSE NOD?
ONLY CERTIFIED NODISTICIANS CAN DIAGNOSE NOD. AT THE FOREFRONT, ANNOYING RACE FAN (ARF) IS ONE THAT CAN DIAGNOSE CASES OF NOD.

ARE THERE ANY CURES FOR NOD?
AT THIS TIME, THERE ARE NO KNOWN CURES FOR NOD. READING ABOUT NASCAR THROUGH THE MEDIA AND SOCIAL MEDIA CAN TEMPORARILY RELIEVE NOD. WATCHING OLD NASCAR RACES VIA YOUTUBE MAY ALSO HELP ON A TEMPORARY BASIS. ONLY HAVING A NEW NASCAR SEASON CAN FIX NOD ON A LONG-TERM BASIS.

ARE THERE NOD SUPPORT GROUPS?
YES. TWITTER IS A GREAT SUPPORT GROUP FOR THOSE SUFFERING FROM NOD. PLEASE VISIT HTTP://WWW.TWITTER.COM TO LEARN MORE.