THE ANNOYING RACE FAN INTERVIEW #3

Queue "Good Vibrations" by Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch)

ARF: HELLO, YOU GUYS. WELCOME TO MY (I REALLY DIDN'T INTERVIEW) INTERVIEW. MY GUEST TODAY COVERS NASCAR FOR USA TODAY. PLEASE WELCOME JEFF GLUCK.

(fade music)

ARF: WELCOME TO THE SHOW, JEFF GLUCK.

Jeff Gluck 2: Thanks. It's Jeff Gluck 2.

ARF: 2?

Jeff Gluck 2: Yes. 2.

ARF: WHAT ARE YOU? A LESS POPULAR MOVIE SEQUEL?

Jeff Gluck 2: No, this is my personal representation, not when I cover NASCAR.

ARF: I'M NOT SURE WHAT YOU MEAN, JEFF.

Jeff Gluck 2: Well, Jeff Gluck Covers NASCAR. Jeff Gluck 2 likes reality TV.

ARF: REALITY TV?

Jeff Gluck 2: Yep. I love Survivor.

ARF: YOU MEAN WE'RE NOT GOING TO TALK ABOUT DOVER?

Jeff Gluck 2: I thought we'd talk about the Amazing Race instead.

(ARF looks to his assistant and motions her to come closer)

ARF: (whispers) IS THIS SOME KIND OF JOKE?

ARF's assistant: (whispers back) I had no idea, sir.

(ARF's assistant leaves)

ARF: SO JEFF, HOW ABOUT JEFF GORDON WINNING YESTERDAY. THAT WAS PRETTY COOL, HUH?

Jeff Gluck 2: Can't we just talk about Big Brother? I really love that reality TV.

ARF: SORRY JEFF, THIS IS A RACING-THEMED SHOW. SEE YOUR WAY OUT.

Jeff Gluck 2: But...this...is a new side of me.

ARF: JUST GET OUT OF HERE.

Jeff Gluck 2: Let's talk about Storage Wars, please?

ARF: (in a fit of rage) GET OUT OF HERE. I DON'T KNOW WHO YOU ARE.

Jeff Gluck 2: I..I'm sorry.

(Jeff Gluck 2 exits)

ARF: MY APOLOGIES, FRIENDS. FOR A MINUTE THERE, I THOUGHT I WAS GETTING PUNK'D. UNTIL NEXT WEEK'S INTERVIEW, I'LL SEE YOU WHEN I SEE YOU.

(Queue "Good Vibrations")

**PLEASE NOTE THAT I DID NOT REALLY INTERVIEW JEFF GLUCK OR JEFF GLUCK 2**